Reflecting on the Grist… the inspiration and the process

In Fall 2005 I enrolled in a “research in fiction” course with Achy Obejas and a biography class with Professor Craig Howes.  In Achy’s class we learned different methods of research to make our fiction stronger, including interviewing someone.  In Craig’s class, one of our assignments was to interview someone and then transcribe the interview word and sound for word and sound.  I interviewed my father and mother-in-law about their lives in the late ‘50s and early ‘60s.  Diana shared about come-as-you-are parties and how her father played chess “long distance” with inmates from San Quentin.  Initially, I was curious about my father’s experiences when we were living in Spain when Franco ruled, but instead he shared about his experiences as a guard at San Quentin when he was attending college at UC Santa Barbara.  

It was serendipity that their interviews contained information about San Quentin, and I was able to draw on two worlds intersecting, using material from both interviews to construct this story.  

In addition, I researched young men who’d committed horrific crimes.  William is based on a real person who was left in an abandoned mine with his siblings when their father went to work.  One day, William’s father never returned.  The real person also had a deformity in his eyelid. 

It is written in third person, first from Jimmy’s perspective, and then from William’s.  Jimmy, the guard, witnesses his first execution, and he is advised by his supervisor to find a spot to focus on to help him cope with his first execution.  He is drawn to William’s hooded and ruined eye.  William, the convict, is told to find a kind face before he’s executed, and he finds one in Jimmy’s.  Their eye contact provides them with a human connection through a horrific moment, a point of grace discovered.  

Jimmy’s scenes at his parents’ home are written in present tense, while the prison scenes are written in past tense. 

I shared this story with both my father and my father’s college friend, Ernie, who had worked at San Quentin, too.  Ernie, a novelist and retired college professor, said the story took him back in time.  I am grateful for the interviews which inspired me to write about something outside my comfort zone.

It was workshopped in my writing group with Tammy, Chris, Tom, mentored by Ian MacMillan.  I included it in my MA thesis, The Grace of Dark Times.  Ian had strongly suggested I title my collection The Point of Grace, using this story as the key story in the collection.  He was incredibly gracious and supportive when I insisted on my title, which I felt reflected the entire collection, which explored dark life situations.

Ian shared with me that when he was an undergraduate taking a fiction class he ignored his professor’s advice on a rewrite.  Ian submitted the piece for publication and it was accepted.  He shared the good news with his professor who then asked about the changes.  Ian admitted that he had not followed his mentor’s advice.  His mentor congratulated him on knowing and honoring his material.  That publication earned him a spot at Iowa Writers’ Workshop, the gem of writing programs.  Ian brought the Workshop practices to University of Hawai‘i, Mānoa when he developed the creative writing program in the 1960s. 

Reflecting on the Grist… the inspiration and the process

When I returned to college to complete my BA, I was an older student… in fact, my older son’s classmates were in my classes.  So, I felt a bit out of place in the creative writing class, because everyone was writing about first love, while I was concerned about other life issues.  So, I was working out a storyline about first love to “fit in.”  I remember standing on the balcony peering into the central courtyard where plants and trees grew tall and thick and chatting with Alexei.  I had known Alexei since he was in preschool with my sons and then through high school days.  He said if he had to read another story about first love he was going to jump over the railing.  I know he was just kidding, but in my mind I thought, well, I don’t want that to happen.  And so “Reunion” was born.

I drew inspiration from many people for this story.  Alexandra’s name honors Alexei who inspired me to find a broader topic to write about, and my friend Alexis, who beat breast cancer.  My “Lanikai pals” from high school have been supportive of each other through life’s many twists and turns, but I wondered what if a childhood friend refused to love and unconditionally accept a friend’s choices.  I also drew inspiration from Paul, a man permanently injured in a car accident when he was in college, now wheelchair bound; I was impressed with his confidence and sheer sexiness.  My many gay and lesbian friends have inspired me with their courage and commitment, and I will always appreciate being invited to a wonderful wedding celebration in Seattle where family and friends lifted the brides up in love.  

In terms of place.  I intentionally located Michael and Alex’s home in town, a contrast from Rachael and Chris’s home in Punalu‘u, my home.  My description of Rachael and Chris’s haven is basically wishful dreaming that my own home could be such a place.  

There has been much written about the New York heroes of 9/11, but I wondered what if someone refused the call to enter the towers… what then?  Not everyone responds in a heroic manner when faced with challenging situations.  Tim’s enlistment is his way to atone for his sin of inaction–inaction from shock, cowardice, fear, or premonition.  

Regarding misdiagnosis issues.  Yes, it happens.  Unfortunately.  And, so I wanted to explore this a bit… Alex is unhinged from the news and still dealing with it.  

Alex’s obsession with Patrick deals with how the loss of a first love can affect the survivor.  In one of the many versions of this story, Alex and Patrick are making love when his younger brother dies from an accidental gunshot wound.  Patrick, feeling guilty, turns the gun on himself, shooting himself in the heart.  Alex believes her false-positive breast cancer diagnosis is karma for making love with Patrick when they were tasked to babysit his brother.  Too dramatic?  Some readers thought so.

It is written in first person, Alex’s point of view.  It would be interesting to explore the story from Tim’s point of view.  He comes across as so confident, but there’s a very vulnerable side to him that would be interesting to hear.

It’s written in present tense, unless Alex is journaling, and then it’s in past tense.  

This was workshopped in ENG 413 or 414 in Ian MacMillan’s class and again in my writing group under Ian’s mentorship.  It was also workshopped in Achy Obejas graduate class and was included in my MA thesis, The Grace of Dark Times.  

I have often thought about expanding it into a screenplay…

Reflecting on the Grist… 

the inspiration and the process

This story explores a “what if” a first-love couple meet up years after they broke up.  In the beginning, Lyssa is anticipating the visit, nervous about it.  Then, she reflects on the visit after the family has left.  I use the independent conversations between Lyssa and John, Kate, and Tiffany to create a picture of their lives, public and private.  Lyssa unexpectedly becomes the keeper of secrets.  It’s told in first person, from Lyssa’s point of view and is either her expectation or reflection, except when she is at the lei stands and baggage claim where she meets London. 

Lyssa’s experiences with her old lover and his family allow her to release him from her heart as a lost opportunity; her connection has shifted from John to his entire family.  The chance encounter with London, the man Lyssa meets at the airport, provides an opportunity for her to explore a new adventure.  

Although I received feedback from Ian MacMillan for many pieces over the years, his feedback on this piece in ENG 313 made me feel like a “legitimate” writer.  He marveled over the way I had handled the time jumps.  It was later workshopped in our writer’s group with Chris and Tammy, under Ian’s mentorship and included in my MA thesis, The Grace of Dark Times.